वर्णन: सर्व चरण

प्रथम प्रहर प्रश्न प्रस्तुत करता है,
कौन है वो, किसके साथ अंक शयन करते हो ?

प्रथम प्रहर पुरुष प्रमाण देता है 
सखी है, संगिनी मेरी, उसी के साथ अंक शयन करता हूँ ।।

द्वितीय द्वार दर्प से द्वंद करता है,
स्वर्ण को त्याग, किसको आलिंगन करते हो ?

द्वितीय द्वार पर द्रव्य दर्शन देता है,
अभिसारिका मेरी, असीमित प्रेम से आलिंगन करता हूँ ।। 

तृतीय तर्क तृष्णा से तुष्ट होता है
विनम्र हो क्यों तिरस्कृत होते हो ?

तृतीय तर्क  तीक्ष्ण तान देता है 
अक्षम्य को क्षमा कर मंथन करता हूँ ॥ 

चतुर्थ चर्म चौसर पर चिहुँकता है 
धर्म को धारण कर, किसके लिए दाँव लगाते हो ?

चतुर्थ चर्म चहुँ ओर व्याप्त होता है 
कर्महीन कर्म को सत्यापित करता हूँ ॥ 

पंचम पर्व पार्थ पर प्रकट होता है 
क्यों भ्रम से भ्रमित भ्रमण करते हो ?

पंचम पर्व प्रभुत्व स्वीकार करता है 
विश्वास कर विश्व का वहन करता हूँ ||  

दया

"आ रहा हूँ बेटा, बस पहुचने ही वाला हूँ", पिछले दो चौराहों से यही बुदबुदा रहा था वो, बार बार। इतनी सर्द रात में, भगाए जा रहा रिक्शा। क्या फ़र्क पड़ता है किसी को रास्ते में, क्या नाम है उसका, और क्यूँ खाली रिक्शा भगा रहा  था।

लगभग दम टूट ही गया था, झोपडी तक पहुचते पहुचते। कुछ तो पूर्वाभास था, की पुसपा बस पहुचती ही होगी उसके 4 महीने के रवि को लेकर। किसी रावण की भाँती टूट ही पड़ी थी पुसपा उस पर, 'रामू,अगर फिर देरी की तो झोपडी में ही छोड़ जाऊंगी इसको'. बिना अपराध के अपराधी सा खड़ा हुआ सुन गया वो। क्या करता, रवि जब एक महीने का था, तभी सीता चल बसी। सो दिन में पुसपा के पास रवि को छोड़ रिक्शा चलता था वो। पुसपा की एक ही शर्त थी, नौ बजे से पहले वापस आ जाना, वर्ना वो रवि को ऐसे हे छोड़ जाएगी।

खैर अब आ गया था वो, उसने रवि को अपनी बाँहों में लिया, जाने कब से दूध के लिए बिलख रहा था, इससे पहले कुछ पूछ पाता पुसपा तो चली गयी थी, उसने झोपडी में देखा, कुछ नहीं था जिससे वो रवि को चुप करा सकता, बस सीने से ही लगा पाया। अब दूध तो था नहीं, सो उसने एक चमची में थोडा सा पानी लिया उसी में थोड़ी से चीनी मिला कर देने लगा, थोड़ी देर में रवि चुप होकर सोने की कोशिश करने लगा।

बाहर ठण्ड बढती जा रही थी, पता नहीं ये महीना कैसे निकलेगा, सोच सोच कर ही  हैरान था, रवि को गोदी में लेकर दीवार से सर लगा कर बैठ गया, थोड़ी ही देर में बारिश शुरू गयी। हवा तो ठंडी थी ही, अब बर्फीली हो चली थी, उसने रवि को अपने अन्दर भीच सा लिया। 

रवि ने भी एक अनजाने डर से सहम कर रोना बंद कर दिया, वो भी शांत हो गया, ईश्वर  को मन में धन्यवाद दिया, की चलो कुछ तो दया हुई। 

रात में सर्दी बदती गयी, बर्फ पड़नी शरू हुई और बर्फीली हवा खिड़की से आती रही।

खैर रात बीती और सवेरा भी हुआ, अभी आसमान में सूरज मराज प्रकट ही ही थे की खीजती हुई पुसपा झोपड़े में चली आई, 'अरे आज काम नहीं जायेगा क्या ?'...कहते ही उसने अपना हाथ बढाया, और अगले पल चीख पड़ी।

ईश्वर ने रात में बड़ी दया की, रवि के साथ उसने रामू को भी उस भयंकर सर्दी से मुक्त कर दिया था, दोनों के चेहरों पर  एक निश्छल से मुस्कान थी। 

रामू ने सीता से किया वादा निभाया,  जब तक जीया, रवि को सीने से लगा कर जीया। रामू और रवि दोनों ही अब मुक्त थे और अब कभी अलग ना होंगे।

Sakshya

He never imagined that it can happen to him. He use to walk every evening across the shore since he finally decided to settle in this city...far from almost everybody who knew him. But today he felt his heart sinking more and more as he is walking along...

Today is May 12, 2058 - he is supposed to celebrate 80th birthday...but he is not...he never planned for it...he always believed he shall not live more that 40-45 years....but somehow...somewhere...something went wrong or too correct and he continued to live...

He saw the demise of all the loved ones...and very near ones...he forces himself to try to remember names of his few friends, the life and moments ...and all of sudden...life start rolling in front of him just like a reeling movie...

...to be continued. This post is pending since 2005 in draft...I kept collecting few pieces here and there...I assure you readers this is gonna be the most senti post ever conceived by me..you are gonna see how loss of near one keeps adding life to his life...how he watches merciful Lord taking away every single breeze around him

.just to tease your thought process a little bit more...start imagining yourself in era...where you see the horizon and there is nobody expect the horizon......

read through the very one among first few post devdaas last paragraph I am gonna see if I can create the magic once corners by Sharat Chandra himself.

dialogue

Let's finally start this story written only in dialogues. This is the first time I am experimenting with style to story telling...let's see how much I succeed. :)...there shall be only few lines in between to talk about time, place etc....(forget the quotes :) )

=======================================================

"Priya, why it's so difficult for you to see the point ?...Within few days we shall be out of this damn MBA program. You shall move to Bangalore, and I shall be moving to chennai...Think about us....How do you think we shall be able to keep this relationship on ? ...without any name to it....It's almost illogical...."

You started it again....Anand....How should I make you see my point....My family is not ready...yet ...to accept that I have grown older....I do not know if, I myself am confident of us...I am starting off with my career for the first time...Ufff...You Men....You are so different in reality...

O Lord....What's this "You Men" ?...Priya, it's not about Men or Women....You know how much I love you....We both want to get married, isn't it so..?....I am moving to a stable job, and you know that I can take care of relationships very well...then why...Priya why...Why you donot want to submit this to our parents....

I can't do it Anand...you need to accept it....If you do not agree....we both can logically agree to disagree....

'Shucks Man...."

Anand moves out....walks till the gate of the college..lights up a cigarette...Looks up the sky and shouts..."What the Heck ? this is not going anywhere..." sucks the butt harder....

Delhi Airport: Priya has already boarded, Anand's flight is delayed by 4 hours.

"Oh Lord, Wat the Fu*k ...It raining still..."...Anand looks around, "Hi Man, can you lend me a cig....Its raining and ..and...."

"No issues...Man...May this brings light to your life".....

To Be continued....

Any Suggesstion on what should happen next :)

!! Devoid of Soul !!

February 10, 2005 : He is so happy today. He was supposed to return in July, but today he is boarding flight back to India. He has to attend his friend's wedding on Feb 14, 2005.

February 14, 2005: Today His friend "Anand" is getting married to "Reshmi". No Hiccups, nothing. A simple Marriage Function it is. Arranged marriage it is. Today is the first day He saw "Reshmi". Cute, confident, charming She is. Jovial, juvenile & just she is. There is always smile on her face and twinkle in her eyes, and dimple on her cheeks is just amazing. Anand's happiness is beyond words. Anand is a normal, well settled, foky guy.

February 17, 2005 : He is flying back to US to finish his pending assignment.

March 2nd, 2005: Anand & Reshmi hath sent pics of there Honeymoon to him. Today He has made his mind to get married as soon as possible. He is now planning all the affairs.

April 11, 2005: Anand and Reshmi are shifting to Chennai. He is so happy to have a couple Anand and Reshmi in Chennai

May 12, 2005: Today is His Birthday. He called up Reshmi, but her mobile was down, He calls up Anand. Anand tells him, "Reshmi is ill, She is in ICU at Apollo." He is shocked. Reshmi caught some infection in her liver and now facing severe jaundice.

July 12, 2005: He is back in India today. He went to Reshmi's home to meet her. Reshmi is still jovial. She is bed ridden since May. She has Lost all the glow from her eyes. Doctors have lost hope. They are unable to find the remedy for her continous fever and other ailments. He is puzzled. Anand seems all lost. It's not even 6 months.

Rest days in July : Every Evening He visits Reshmi. She loves Roses and Jasmine, He shall make sure that he carries at least one of them every day to her. Anand has taken without pay leaves from office. He is totally shattered. They shall spend nights talking to each other. His instincts are telling him, that Reshmi doesnot have much time left. He felt, She is waiting for somebody from so long. There seems a Vacuole in her life. She seems to be loosing grip on life but her smile is still there.

Early August : He is now afraid of his instincts. He and Anand shall cook dinner together for Reshmi everyday. Both are trying so hard to keep Reshmi happy. But sometime her eyes will simply pierce him down his heart and whenever that happens He is bound to skip a heartbeat.

August 19, 2005: Rakhsha Bandhan - Today He decided not to go to meet Reshmi and Anand. He has always been un-happy about this day and never wanted anybody to see his tears.

August 20, 2005 - He met Reshmi again, She is smiling today, all of a sudden there was glow on her face today. They all went to Barista after such a long time together. Anand as usual took "Cafe Latte". Reshmi and He both took sips from bitter "Espresso Italiano". He knows they share some feel together. It's his instincts and it's her body thats decaying.

September 3, 2005 - Anand & Reshmi today visited His apartment. Reshmi was coming for the first time and He has promised that he shall not hide anything in the apartment. She wanted to see his aparment in RAW. There were posters on the wall, butts here and there, books lying in shelfs, on floor, in kitchen even in shower. A shelf full of show pieces. Reshmi kept on smiling. The glow of Barista was back again. But today his instincts, his sense were predicting otherwise. He dared not to speack anything about it.

September 3rd, 2005 11PM: Reshmi took the Cigarette for the first time, Anand was a chain smoker like him, but left. But today Reshmi asked Him to light one for everybody, with the thought "May it Brings light to our life", they kept exchanging the cig.

September 4th, 2005, 1:00 AM: Reshmi's eyes are about to betray her. She is shivering with cold. Anand is calling for Apollo Emergency. He is holding her hand. She wanted to say something, her voice is low, he pulls himself near to her face. She kisses him on his cheek and said, "Good Bye, May you find LOVE !!". Her Voice is breaking, He wanted to know, "How and Why".

Anand is still on phone, Reshmi is no more and He is again devoid of Soul

!! They Never Left !!

(11:00 PM, December 20th, 2003) - "Ja raha hoon mein, aur ab nahin aayonga kabhi !!", he yelled, took away some his stuff, hurriedly started his scooter and came out of the house.

(11:00 AM, January 7th, 2004) - "Kewal apne Certificates lene aaya hoon", he said to his mother, who was standing at the door, tears flooding in her eyes. She wanted to embrace him, but than he has now become brutal and cruel, to not let the emotions erode his EGO.

(11:25 AM, January 7th, 2004) - Bheegi aankhon se woh vida ho gaya. Ghar se nikalte hue soch raha tha, kitni choti si baat per woh "Ja raha hoon mein, phir kabhi na aane ke liye" Keh aaya tha.

(11:00 AM, August 2nd, 2004) - Switching company again, now he is richie rich, He want it to share with his family and celebrate at home, but he hath left that, and jub bhi usse ghar ki yaad aati hai to Maa ki woh Bheegi Aankhen. "No !! It's was not my fault, Pitaji was adamant, Maa also supported him that day", he consoles himself. Asks his bro to deliever the news of the switch.

(11:00 AM, October 4th, 2004) - Switched again, Now he is ahead of all the guys he was competing against, He wants to see his "Maa" just once before he leaves for alien city, But has no courage to face her, so he goes to the Park in front of the Temple, where his Mom use to visit, and uses Binoculars to see her one last time.

(11:00 AM, January 15th, 2005) - Today he is flying US again. He wanted to share the news, But was able to call up his friend only and then asked him to convey the news. His EGO is....but still doesnot want to face his Father and "Maa". His friend tells him that his Mom is ill. He say, "hmmm".

(11:00 AM, July 12, 2005) - He has identified a girl to marry, Coming to India to marry her in Court. Only few Friends are there. His Bro calls him, "Congrats Bhaiya, Ab to bahut bade ho gaye ho, Maa ne Bahu ke liye Kangun Bheje hain, 'Sneh' aaj shaam pahuch raha hai, woh leta aayega!!". He knows the sarcasm and hatred in the voice. Shaam ko "Sneh", bahu ke haath mein kangan rakh ker chala jata hai. He sat at the rooftop in night and after a long time, kept on smoking continously and "Staring at the space"

(11:00 AM, Oct 14, 2005) - He got the H1, and is flying to US with wife. "Shall never come back !! For whom to come ?", were the thoughts hanging round him.

(11:00 AM, Oct 20, 2006) - "News is bad, you Dad had a stroke", Sangini broke the news to him. With tears in his eyes, "Bro shall take care !! I have come too far now !". "Atleast you should call !", says Sangini. "It doesnot matter now !". he replied.

(11:00 AM, Oct 21, 2006) - Calls Ayush, asks him to travel to home and mobilises resources. Ayush retorts, "They need you !!"

(11:00 AM, Dec 29, 2008) - "He just wanted to see you one last time", Ayush calls and tells him.

(11:00 AM, January 1, 2009) - He enters Escorts, New Delhi, finds the ICU, meets the Doctors, goes and talks to his Dad one last time, both cried for an hour and then he was left alone in......

(11:00 AM, May 13, 2013) - Bro is coming to Canada. He wants to know, meet but....

(11:00 AM, May 17, 2017) - "'Maa' is coming to Canada", Ayush tells him. Sangini declares that she is going to meet her along with kids. "No, there is no point. Prakhar & Piyali shall never understand."

(11:00 AM, August 19, 2022) - "Prakhar is in college, Piyali shall go next year, at least now you should ....", says Sangini.

(11:00 AM, May 11, 2025) - "Piyali, Will you accompany me to meet your Grandmother !!", he asks his daughter. "Dad, I know, but okay !!"

(11:00 AM, May 12, 2025) - They were standing near a tree. "See Piyali, She is your Grandmother, and that young gal is 'Nisha'. and the guy with newspaper is your uncle, Chalo ! Lets Go back", He sighed. "But Dad, We have come from such far land, at least we should go and give them a hug", Piyali demands. "No honey !! Lets go back", he says.

(11:00 AM, May 13, 2025) - "Mom, Why Pops did that way, Nisha was so cute, but donno why dad's eyes .....", Piyali asks Sangini. Sangini wanna tell but then....

(11:00 AM, Dec 31, 2025) - "Lets go Mom !! It's been enough", He is confronting Mom alone today.

(11:00 AM, January 3, 2026) - He along with "Maa" is resting along the banks of "Ganges" at Haridwar. Both are calm, as if "THEY NEVER LEFT".

(Sometime, Some date, 2037) - Sangini, Prakhar, Piyali, Nisha, Ayush and hundreds of others never heard from Him and "Maa" till date.

!! Fortunate ! Am I ?

I sat with her for a while, then started walking along the beach with her, I don't why, she also started walking with me.

Far at the horizon Sun started to settle. She was looking too young at that time. I noticed her smile and long black hairs flowing down.

After a long walk I realised, she is still with me. Her face was calm and had unparallel grace. I wondered and asked, "You look too calm today. It's good to see you in smiling."

She winked, giggled and said, "Today, somebody was too lonely on the shore, so I sat with him, took a walk with him, now he seems to be calm, I am happy for him"

I asked her again, "Were you knowing each other before ? or was he a stranger to you ?"

She said, "I am never a stranger to anybody, Everybody knows me, though its only once they meet me ! You are fortunate, I am DEATH"

and then She vanished, and I stood there on shore.

Devdaas - The last Paragraph

Long ago, I read "Devdaas - Sharat Chandra". Here is the last Paragraph from the novel. Its not only the theme of the novel but also the truth of LIFE

Aap log jo kahani padenge humse hi gamgeen honge. To bhi kabhi agar Devdas jaise badnaseeb, Asayanmi (one who has no control over himself ) aur Papi se parichaye ho, to uske liye prarthna (Pray) kijiyega. prarthna kijiyega ki aur chahe jo bhi ho, uske jaisi maut (Death) kisi ki na ho. Marne ka koi gum nahin, lekin koi sneh-sparsh (touch of love) us samay uske lalaat (forehead) tak pahuche-ek bhi karuna-vigalit (compassion), snehmey (lovely) mukhra(face) dekhte hue es jivan ka ant(End) ho. Marte vaqt jisse veh kisi ki aakh mein aansoon ki ek boond dekh ker mur sake.(So that at the time of his death he can see at least a drop of Tear in the eye of someone Dear)

Here is the English Translation of the paragraph

All those who shall read this story shall be in sorrow like us. Even than if you ever get introduced to anybody as unlucky and sinner as Devdaas, than please Pray that no matter what happens, his life should not end and he should not recieve death like Devdaas. There is no grief about dying, but there should be "touch of love" over his forehead, there should be a lovely face dipped in compassion in front of his eyes when he dies. So that at the time of his death, he can see at a drop of tear in the eye of someone Dear.


[This Last line is the only truth for which a human Lives]

[This is what for which he fights his whole life "to have someone who shall Cry, when He Die"]