Me, My Colleagues, My Manager...almost everybody was getting tortured by these telebanker for continuous calls to avail a Personal Loan ....Oh lord....it was screwing everybody's happiness...so finally we decided for revenge on these calls....
Initially we use to be polite and use to turn down the request...and tell them that our company pays us well enough to take care of ourselves...but they never use to listen...then finally during one of the team meeting I gave this demo to my team members :) and we succeeded....
trin..trin....mobile rings ..
Me: Hello....
Tele (She): Sir we are calling from *&^% Bank, we are offering personal loans, are you interested
Me: (Putting the mobile on loudspeaker while telling the group of 18 people that this is the 5th call from *&^% Bank...)...Well, I am not interested in loans. Do you have anything like "Donations" ?
Tele: ...pause...Sir we are offering...Loans...we have competitive interest...
Me: (Cutting her off in between)...Miss, Do you any process for Donations...Actually, I am looking for anything greater than 1 Lakh...I accept Cash, Cheque or you can do direct transfer to my account.
Tele: No Sir, we do not have anything like this....
Me: Well !! (Surprise tone)...I think you should have...You are such a great bank ...and you are such a nice telebanker...with such good voice, and i think you must be having good heart too....This is philanthropy....Please be more Human.... (My team started laughing at this)
Tele: Sir....we are a bank...we do not give donations...
Me: See, if you give me donation, you shall not only make me happy, but you shall be making my team happy too...We have not gone for a team-lunch and a outing from so many weeks...If you can send this donation in another 72 hours...We POOR Software Engineers can go for a very good lunch....We shall definitely send you our letter of thanx...signed by all of us....I shall write blog about...and we shall even tell other 200 employees to ask for donations....It shall be such a good publicity for you....
Tele: No Sir...(now She is frustrated and getting angry too).....this call is not for that....
Me:See....if you donate us money... This will be counted as good deed. Your Lord shall be happy....Do Not think about this life...Think Ahead...Think Future...Think about God...Heaven....See you should think about life after death....Think again...Think Global...think Universe...You are not alone...There is Lord above you...Donate...and you Sins will be washed...How about 2 Lakhs :)...
(By this time half the team was holding the tummy :) laughing all the time...
Me...Continuing: Try talking to your Team Lead....There are Tax Benefits too in Donation...You can write off the donated amount from the Year end Income :) under some 89C ( random number :) )....okay...
Tele: Ya sir....(growling)...I shall come back...
Me: Ya ya Good....Just prepare the cheque in my Name ... when shall you call next :)
Tele: thanx a lot Sir...Bye...
Me : Ha Ha Ha ....Finally at last....
Since then ....No Calls....
he he he Good one,
ReplyDeleteI shall try this
Hey I tried this.
ReplyDeleteOtherday, myself & my cousin were surfing net, the much waited call came.
A girl was at the other end.
When she asked do I need loan, I asked how much she is ready to give
She said 2 to 20 lakhs.
I said Thanks so much even I was waiting for some thing like this, but I dont want loan give me donation.
She dint know what to say or do, she handed a call to her senior some guy.
I was at my best (pulling legs)
He was also confused. He said we are offering loan mam.
I said I am interested in 20 lakh donation.
He said we dont have that policy
I said Add this to ur policy, Just imazine you are working on such a good cause.
U donate me 20 lakhs, I will go on a world tour , I will enjoy myself. ofcourse I will dedicate my pleasure trip in your name.
He dint know what to say. He said I will discuss with my seniors & get you back.
I said please better do that fast .
Myself & my cousin rolled laughing. That was real fun