Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Handling Personal Loan Calls

Here is the tip that finally worked :)

Me, My Colleagues, My Manager...almost everybody was getting tortured by these telebanker for continuous calls to avail a Personal Loan ....Oh lord....it was screwing everybody's happiness...so finally we decided for revenge on these calls....

Initially we use to be polite and use to turn down the request...and tell them that our company pays us well enough to take care of ourselves...but they never use to listen...then finally during one of the team meeting I gave this demo to my team members :) and we succeeded....



trin..trin....mobile rings ..

Me: Hello....
Tele (She): Sir we are calling from *&^% Bank, we are offering personal loans, are you interested


Me: (Putting the mobile on loudspeaker while telling the group of 18 people that this is the 5th call from *&^% Bank...)...Well, I am not interested in loans. Do you have anything like "Donations" ?
Tele: ...pause...Sir we are offering...Loans...we have competitive interest...

Me: (Cutting her off in between)...Miss, Do you any process for Donations...Actually, I am looking for anything greater than 1 Lakh...I accept Cash, Cheque or you can do direct transfer to my account.
Tele: No Sir, we do not have anything like this....

Me: Well !! (Surprise tone)...I think you should have...You are such a great bank ...and you are such a nice telebanker...with such good voice, and i think you must be having good heart too....This is philanthropy....Please be more Human.... (My team started laughing at this)
Tele: Sir....we are a bank...we do not give donations...

Me: See, if you give me donation, you shall not only make me happy, but you shall be making my team happy too...We have not gone for a team-lunch and a outing from so many weeks...If you can send this donation in another 72 hours...We POOR Software Engineers can go for a very good lunch....We shall definitely send you our letter of thanx...signed by all of us....I shall write blog about...and we shall even tell other 200 employees to ask for donations....It shall be such a good publicity for you....
Tele: No Sir...(now She is frustrated and getting angry too).....this call is not for that....

Me:See....if you donate us money... This will be counted as good deed. Your Lord shall be happy....Do Not think about this life...Think Ahead...Think Future...Think about God...Heaven....See you should think about life after death....Think again...Think Global...think Universe...You are not alone...There is Lord above you...Donate...and you Sins will be washed...How about 2 Lakhs :)...

(By this time half the team was holding the tummy :) laughing all the time...

Me...Continuing: Try talking to your Team Lead....There are Tax Benefits too in Donation...You can write off the donated amount from the Year end Income :) under some 89C ( random number :) )....okay...
Tele: Ya sir....(growling)...I shall come back...

Me: Ya ya Good....Just prepare the cheque in my Name ... when shall you call next :)
Tele: thanx a lot Sir...Bye...

Me : Ha Ha Ha ....Finally at last....

Since then ....No Calls....

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Hey Hirdu !! What's Cooking ?

People around me always desire to know, whats cooking in Hirdu's mind ;) Well....Shall tell about it sometime later...Today I shall be telling you about what's cooking in my kitchen .... :)

Well its lots and lots of stuff..Now a days I am trying so many different different dishes. Lemme share some of these here ....

1. First Come First Serve - The Salad

At first look this is not a receipe of any great salad. But If I tell you, that this is "Red Reddish" and "Red Carrots" in Bangalore...does it rings bells in your imagination somewhere....

Well folks, it's real difficult to find these 2 simple delicious vegetables of north in this silicon town....You might need to run pillor to post and post to pillar to find these...

Anyhow folks, donot worry...You shall be able to find both of these time to time only at 2 places - No.1 - Namdhari Fresh at Koramangala and No. 2 - Spensors, 80 feet Road, Indira Nagar.

Cut both of these fresh and add Black Salt (in Bangalore - Use Catch Black salt, you won't find it anywhere else), sprinkle half of lemon and add some black pepper....and voila you have wonderful Salad Ready....Full of Energy, Vitamins and what not... :)

Shall continue with rest of .....

Thursday, January 17, 2008

V Sync with Velocity...

"V-Sync with Velocity is the name of game Dear " - This is what I conclude today...

Does not matter how...Does not matter why....But V need to do it...ALL By Ourselves.....

Does not Matter if I deny but...The world wants me to sync myself with office, home, neighbor next door, manager in next cubicle, team on-shore, team off-site, wife at home, relatives at far, Mom 's on phone, Buddy on Chat, foes on the boat, friends on the shore, Lord in heaven, Humans on floor, cops on the street, waitress in the red skirt, moon in the sky, tears in the eye, captions on the wall, paintings in the hall, turn right or just go left till it turns to be right, economics on the cross-roads, magic on the Chess board, bare chested fate, be in office late, come home early (How ??), relish dinner at night, have morning Tea in flight, catch the real "real" in real desire, Just keep on the fire....

Let the Lord Smile, there is still wink in my eye...the soul underneath, I don't know if it breathes...Cautious am I :)...or do I still lie... :)

Anyhow....I don-no why....but to sync it all I lie....that I live...and I live nearby....

My eyes might not be bright, but as I always see it in sight....although I lie...but still I live...nearby....

You need to understand.....it's either V-Sync with Velocity...or else...we do speed sync..

:) I know techs know the diff between Speed and Velocity :)....

All this jargon is confusing me...I do not know now....Who am I....Where am I ? - This reminds me....Need to read "The Mind's I" again....

I am losing myself on memory....too many threads....

Saturday, January 12, 2008

What is everybody missing ?

Today Evening, a friend arrived...and as usual we talked the walk....

Usually We talk about anything under the sun or the moon :) or over it sometimes....

I do not know what talk led to it....but we somehow again discovered...what everybody is missing now a days....

Yes folks....It's nothing great but it's important....Our folks are missing listening ears....

They do not know whom to talk...when they want to talk...or even if they do not want to talk....

....So guys and gals we finally concluded that no matter how busy or how super-lord you are....you need to have somebody to talk to....

finally I conclude in here with these words....Happiness walks in pairs....She is never alone....
....find someone today....if you can not ...email...me ... post a note over here ...I shall talk thee :)

Sunday, January 06, 2008

Happy New Year 2008

Okay folks I know....I am late :) but what's the difference.....

The New Year is very much in ...and so are the happiness, joy and delight associated with it.....

so I might be late by some people's standards....but from the place where I stand....I am not... :)

Thus folks.....Have a great New Year....and great happiness and great joy in it....Enjoy !!!