Sunday, December 04, 2011

How To Catch A Lion

I do not remember the origin of this forward email, it came long long time back... however what to post in writer's block...
It is advisable to understand the original Laws from

1. Newton's Method:
Let, the lion catch you. For every action there is an equal and opposite  reaction. This implies you have  caught the lion (Assuming that you're  alive).

  2. Einstein Method:
Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion.  Due  to higher relative  velocity, the lion will also run  faster and will get  tired soon. Now you can  trap it easily.

3. Schrodinger Method:
At any given moment, there is a positive probability  that the lion should be  in the cage. So set the trap, sit down and wait.

4. Inverse Transformation Method:
We place a spherical cage in the forest and enter it.  Perform an inverse  transformation with respect to lion  Lion's in and we are out!

5. Thermodynamic Procedure:
We construct a semi-permeable membrane which allows every thing to pass in  it except the lions. Then sweep the entire forest  with  it.

6. Integration Differentiation Method:
Integrate the forest over the entire the area. The  lion is somewhere in the  result. So differentiate the result PARTIALLY w.r.t.  the lion to trace out  the lion.

7. Bohr Method:
Find a lioness. The lion would be rotating around her  in circular paths, and eventually would decrease the radius between him and  his nucleus.

8. The Moron's Method:
Tie down a goat with a tree, and wait on the tree for the lion. Hurrah! Here  comes the lion. Now as you have found it, get down and run with your goat to save it, before the lion uselessly kills it, so that you could use it next time. 

No comments:

Post a Comment